–Robnett is either incredibly quick–or–has great baserunning instincts–or–is the only Cub to realize that A.J. has a weak arm at this point in his career and was determined to take advantage of it. I don’t know where Robnett will eventually fit into the system, they seem to have an over abundance of maybe Minor League outfielders these days(Fuld, Robnett, Snyder, Colvin) as well as viable Major league choices(Gathright, Johnson, Fukudome, Taguchi?). Len did mention that Robnett has only stolen twenty bases in five minor league seasons, so I don’t know if he has:

A) Never taken advantage of his speed

-OR-

B) Stole on Pierzynski’s weak arm.

But he looked to be quick beating out an infield single before his second of the two stolen bags. Maybe he has the instinct to steal bases, I don’t know. If he does pan out then we got something for a sometimes nothing in Wuertz who for the record was effective when:

His slider was on

Which was more off than on in the past year.

Mike Fontenot and Ryan Theriot can hit. These guys may be the hokey joke about short and white with no range, but these guys CAN hit. I know Fontenot has the questionable record against left-handers, but, as long as Miles can produce(if Mike fails against left-handed pitching) then Derosa shouldn’t be missed regardless of the numbers he puts up this year.

Micah Hoffpauir can also hit, but his swing still has a bit too much of an uppercut to it at times, which leaves it susceptible. Is he a solution for when Derrek leaves?  Doubtful. Even with the bat, is his glove good enough? I don’t think Lee’s glove will be fully appreciated(even if it is just slightly above average now) until a real butcher is installed there. Will Micah be that? Don’t know, but Theriot’s arm and Ramirez’s penchant for throws in the dirt could become alot more glaring once he leaves.

Chad Fox can still get outs. Is he going to make the team? I doubt it. He lacks any real dominant stuff, or from what I saw today. I’ve seen him before, but in such a small sample size, that today I really paid attention. He has the ability to get outs, but if there is even a slightly better option I don’t see anyway they can justify taking him.  He’s Borowski stuff, without Borowski numbers.

They lost.

7-6, but it doesn’t matter. Spring Training.

I caught about an inning of Smardzija, but from that and the ongoing commentary he was off. I say he goes down to AAA and stretches out, works on his pitches, and the Cubs ignore their tribune-ish urge for marketing and do it the INTELLIGENT way, drop the hype and let the kid pan out or not.

We might lose Angel Guzman. He just doesn’t look sharp enough to make the team as it is and he’s out of options. Kind of sad for a kid who has been built up as much as he has and has some incredible pitches.

Lilly pitched four innings today for Team USA, two hits, a run, and awesome ensued.

That’s what I pulled from today’s game that I was actually able to watch. The  major pieces(Fontenot, Theriot, Bradley with a double in the other split)look good, and barring a complete fucking collapse from alot of players then we should be in good shape for the season.

Here’s the Box.

First Pitch is at 3:05 pm central time in Las Vegas VS. The White Sox. Game is On WGN America.

Heilman takes the ball in the first.

What is that?

The best field sobriety test picture I could come up with at this time(and I’ve re-typed this line like five times now).

Moving on:

Carlos Zambrano makes his first start today(and they better fucking hurry up with these guys..I’m tired of beginning like this) in an effort to prove that he is the ACE of a Cubs staff that also features:

Seventeen game winner — Crazy low era owner Ryan Dempster.

Ted F’in Lilly — and his 32-17 record in sixty-eight games started(that’s right…every fucking game he’s been scheduled for He. Has. Pitched. )

Five and One –Rich Harden and his just absurdly low 1.77 era/.972 whip in Twelve games after coming to the Cubs. Fragile or not, he did this last year.

?????? — Yea, that’s kind of the thing…BUT,

HOLY SH&*T!

I’m not putting that voodoo on Carlos. Anyone who’s seen him pitch know’s what he is bringing to the table.

I’ve never seen our rotation from this angle. I’ve heard the talk, and watched the games, but seeing it for the first time(albeit a bit blurry) from this perspective I can’t say anything but–Goddamn!

Yea…HEALTH…Gotcha

I’m F*&ckin Drunk..I can do what I wants!

AT THE PLATE

It’s really a buffet, or of you like, bonanza:

Micah or Mike — Both sport a .400 average or above and combine for twelve rbi’s and six extra base hits(three homers) in twenty-seven at bats.

Ryan Theriot– SuperScapegoat is hitting .600 going six for ten with no walks. That’s putting the ball into fair play SIX TIMES OUT OF TEN!

Douchee singles hitter my ass.

They may all be singles but how many times can you get that f*&cking lucky?

(I’m drunk and now angry..excuse the extra profanity laden tirades)

Doug/Luis/Sam/Deeds/Fuld/ JUST EAT IT… — Up until today’s game(Padres Vs. Cubs 3/1/2009…Ok yesterday’s) everyone had been hitting, pitching, fielding, and or contributing in some way.

RBI’s from fifteen different players?

That’s as much focus as I can give you right now…if you happen to read this before I wake up  and correct it then don’t be surprised if it’s a bit more factual later tomorrow.

First pitch is at 2:05 central time

Against the Arizona Diamondbacks and this:

Brandon Webb

Dan Haren

Doug Davis

Jon Garland

Petit/Scherzer

OK, so not that intimidating, but that WEBB/HAREN one-two…OUCH.

You kind of have to look past the “awesome” copyright anti-infringement measure…

But I understand. It’s cool ….

And for the rest of you villagers–put down those torches and pitchforks.

I know we lost four to two to that blabber-mouth D*&ck and his pet.

It’s Okay

It’s only Spring Training. 

But today did have a bit of that, I don’t know–”Catch the F*&cking ball!” after-taste.

Did it not?

I mean, Dempster may not have walked  7/9ths of the roster( only one), but it does give you that same eerie feeling creeping up the back of your spine, No?

I realize I’m mixing games one and two of last October’s post-season meltdown together for my own narrow purpose but…

Come on!

HITTING

Ryan Theriot –You may have gone two for three today, but all you really did was play into your critics hands. The rest of your line read a bunch of sh*&tty zero’s, meaning your two hollow singles and .600 average didn’t make up for the two(fielding, throwing) errors and being the absolute reason the Cubs lost today.

But it’s cool…

I am not an Anti-Theriotite, just disappointed that today’s L in the loss column speaks more loudly than the actual facts( That Cubs hitting and pitching, all major factors in the past, put. them. in. place. for the win).

On the bright side — Aaron Miles grounded into two double plays today. So that means we can finally all go back to liking this guy.

Whew…

Mike Fontenot — Some people may think–”Oh, that is so cute! He thinks he’s a third baseman honey.”

But not me.

Mike went two for three today, both doubles, and scored one of the Cubs two runs. He is hitting .417(five for twelve, with four of those being extra base hits) this spring.

Reed Johnson –You Son of a Bitch! You went one for three and PUT. THAT. SHIT. DOWN. in center..until Fuld came in to pinch run ?

Jake Fox — I am so sorry Jake( error 1, fielding), but you did get a hit in three at bats. You even scored a run!

AND……..THAT’S IT?

Cub bat’s were pretty quiet against Peavy, with whipping boy Theriot registering the only hit in his three innings. It’s a disappointing outcome to be sure, but not a reason for this because…

PITCHING

Although the box score may not read it, Dempster actually pitched well. He may have faced a total of seven batters in the first inning, but his overall line was two hits with one walk and a K. Sooo–ledgies may be dropping like flies right now, but at least so did Padres hitters when facing…

ALSO PITCHED:

Chad Fox — The man with the oldest arm on the planet pitched a scoreless inning today, giving up a hit with no walks and a K.

Mike Stanton — Just plain old f*&cking old. Goddamn Pinella?  Stanton pitched a perfect inning– and then the sun came up. Ha!

Justin Berg — gave up the only earned run in the game. Some have called this move the “Gutenburg.”

Rocky Roquet– a hit a walk and no runs. Has never heard of “The Gutenburg.”

Kevin Hart — no hit and no walks with a K in one. Hart has bounced back and forth between the Major and Minor leagues the past year or so. Hart could be in the pen, but then again could not. Meh.

Marcos Mateo — His second(or third?) spring training appearance, he closed out the ninth with a perfect inning and a K. Who the F*&ck knows anymore?

With so many pitchers showing up in such a short time you can’t really get a good bead on who is doing what for now and what for the long run yet.

CORRECTIONS:

WBC– The Cubs are actually sending seven players to the classic this year: Lilly(USA), Fukudome(Japan). Marmol(Dominican Republic), Alex Maestri( Italy..and he’s actually Italian!), Soto(Puerto Rico)  Koskie(Canada), and Vince Perkins( Also Canada).

The WBC begins Thursday March Fifth in Tokyo, Japan with a matchup between Japan and China. Game time is 4:30 am eastern standard on ESPN2 and ESPN deportes. Cub Fans will finally get their first good look at Kosuke this spring, so tune in.  The MLB NETWORK will be carrying sixteen games over the course of the classic including, I would imagine, the finals to be played at Dodger Stadium.

The Cubs host the D-ba(gs)cks( are you kidding…are you really going to make it that easy Arizona?) at Ho Ho Kam tomorrow. On the mound in the first is….

CARLOS ZAMBRANO!

Making his first start this spring.

First pitch is at 2:05 Central Standard Time.

Today we are going to eschew what has become the “Original” format to talk about the three different types of major league baseball players, at least I believe, should be on every team:

The Super Star(Soriano, Zambrano)

The Fan Favorite(Ramirez, Theriot)

The Grinder(which is not my favorite term, but F*&k it, it serves my purpose here–Johnson, Fontenot)

The Super Star:

There can be some discrepancy as to whether or not these players always deserve the recognition they get–most have one or two great breakout seasons and then remain on the lips of every sportswriter throughout the tenure of their career–or– have the good fortune to play for either Boston or New York. Their playing time and ridiculous contracts are warranted by their production, but have a tendency to become a hindrance to the team as they age and their skills wane, often times becoming untradeable due to their bloated contracts(Sosa). But, during their hey day on your team they are an essential ingredient to have a winning ball club.

On the Cubs:

Carlos Zambrano — What needs to be said. To know Z is to love Z. His era has been creeping up and his strikeouts have been going down, but so has the games/tantrums ratio. Here’s to hoping  that he keeps his head on straight and that Bako has been working on his hay-maker.

Alfonso Soriano — The Cubs record contract left fielder with the smile that looks like he’s been brushing with bleach, Soriano has yet to play a full season for his oh-so generous team. He was intitially signed for his speed and power at the plate, but ,a string of leg injuries has kept his stolen base totals low and all the time off has kept his home run totals under the forty range. Has shown a bit of patience at the plate so far in spring(two walks in three official at bats) and has said his legs are finally starting to feel “healthy” again. He probably won’t fourty/fourty again, but thirty/any number above thirty is adequate for the guy who, when leading off, somehow coerces the team into an over .600 winning percentage.

The Fan Favorite:

This is the guy who’s jersey you bought and then spent the rest of the afternoon explaining who he is to non Cub fans. His skills, while sometimes on par with the super-star, are usually good enough to warrant an all-star game or two in his career and keep him a valuable asset on the field.

On the Cubs:

Aramiz Ramirez — Ramirez is not a super-star. Should he be? Probably, but maybe it’s his supposed lack of hustle, quiet off-field demeanor, or all the time spent busy fiddling with his cock–but he just hasn’t reached that status despite hitting over twenty-five home runs and driving in a hundred rbi’s in every season since he’s been with the Cubs. Ramirez is even more impressive when someone else is on base, with a .301/.390/.950(last is ops) line for his career. He is hitless so far this spring, but you know, it’s like, latin players just play better when it’s hot and shit. Right?

Ryan Theriot — if you’re a Cub fan then you know why and how Ryan got to be where he is today. He hit a shitload of singles. Critics say he isn’t a major league shortstop, he has no range, no arm, and is flat out slow-short- and white. Apparently Pinella see’s it differently.

The Grinder:

This guy just flat out plays, no matter when-where-or why. They also usually have a hole in their game as big as the one in Pie’s swing(ooooo…suck it B-more). Most often found in a platoon situation or as a defensive replacement or pinch runner to accentuate( some sexy talk about the Cubs) their particular skill set.

On the Cubs :

Reed Johnson — Nuff said. Seriously, the only thing I want to add about Reed is that I’m almost a hundred percent positive he is a product of super-scout Tim Wilkens. If this is what we have to look forward to then the Cubs are in it for a while folks.

Spring Training Unknowns –and now we have the link into the usual pre-game. See how I did that? These are the guys(Hoffpauir, Fuld, Rivas, Scales, Patton, Gathright) fighting it out for maybe one/two spots on the bench. Versatility is the name of the game here, and so far it looks like Micah’s bat and Patton’s arm are speaking pretty loudly.

Things to watch for:

Happy Birthday Hoff ! Hoffpauir turns twenty-nine today and is supposed to get the day off after seeing action in every game so far. Look for D-lee to get the start, or possibly Jake Fox trying to showcase his ability to play the field well enough to beat out the birthday boy as possible backup first/third basemen.

Jake Peavy –Who will not be a Cub this season, but will give Cub fans a chance to see what might have been .

Yea, everyone would have died. Is that what you want Jake? Is it?

Dempster — makes his first start of the spring in an effort to keep up the incredible work he did last season. Yukk Yukk–ya dork.

First pitch is at 2:05 pm in Peoria.

And for anyone in Chicago, Lucero comes to town May tenth at the Metro.

At least it’s starting to feel that way.

I know it’s only spring training and were only four games in, but Cub fans can’t help but notice that same old feeling that ended abruptly in three nights last October–knowing your team is going to win.

It’s an odd feeling, to be a Cub fan and not peek with one eye as you open the paper/web page(assuming you couldn’t catch the game–f*&cking job) only to find out that the team lost a five run lead in the ninth after going scoreless in the first six innings against a Wandy Rodriguez or a Dave Bush( yea…Dave Bush…Fuck that guy)

It’s even sweeter to know your team dropped a thirteen run bomb on their Crosstown pseudo-rivals

The Cubs dropped the Sox this afternoon at Ho Ho Kam by a score of thirteen to nothing.

Thats zero runs scored by the Sox.

And zero runs given up by Aaron Heilman, who took the mound in the first two innings of today’s game. Heilman gave up one hit( to guess who…) Yea, that’s still a goodie. Heilman struck our four of seven batters and walked none, making Pinella and pitching coach Larry Rothschild’s job that much harder when choosing who is going to fill the vacant five slot. Heilman should get a few more starts this spring to prove his worthiness, but if he falters I expect his innings to shorten up as he prepares for an eventual role in the pen. Nothing too ground-breaking

Until Now

ALSO PITCHED:

KEVIN GREGG! –There you are Mr. Gregg. And all one hit and no runs with a K. Oh you…

Neal Cotts — Umm, thanks for coming. Cotts pitched one inning giving up a hit and no runs with a walk. Well played, Mr. Cotts, well played–but I’ve still got my eye on you.

David Patton –Rule-fiver from Cincinnati saw his first action today, pitching two scoreless innings with no walks and two k’s. How does it feel to cost about as much as Soriano’s left index finger?

Ken Kadokura –Second time on the mound for the Japanese league veteran this spring. Pitched an inning of no hit ball with a hit a walk and a K. Was seen wearing a Fukudome style kamikaze headband with it’s own Japanese caricature writing. When translated it read  “F*&CK KOSUKE!”

Jason Waddell — Gee, it’s been so nice getting to know you this spring Mr. Waddell. You and your no hits, no runs and no walks in one. Don’t be a stranger!(even though you most likely will be in a week.)

Esmailin Caridad –Pitched a perfect ninth giving up a hit with a K. Esmailin pitched a perfect ninth with pride and pomposity which people may never purvey as…oh fuck it.

Astonishingly enough, most of the Cub pitchers–be they veteran, rookie, or non-roster invitee–have pitched extremely well. This bodes well for a team that some consider to have an already incredibly strong rotation and back end of the pen. keep your eye on Jason Waddell(Someone else told me to–so now I’m telling you to) as spring progresses as he might be a surprise guy who breaks camp in the pen.

But as solid as the pitching has been, the bats may be the real surprise of early spring training, in which many consider the hitters to be about a week behind pitches in their progress.

AT THE PLATE

Brad Snyder – yet another Minor League outfielder, Snyder played the entire game in right and went two for five with a grand slam in the seventh. He put on a good show today, but with all the outfield depth the Cubs seem to be suddenly sporting, Snyder might be better off looking for another team.

Doug Deeds –didn’t I just get done chastising Bradley about this? The minor league outfielder subbed for Soriano in left and went one for two with a run. Yipee!

Aaron Miles –not Mark Derosa started the game at short today and went one for two. Was eventually lifted for:

Andres Blanco –who was actually sent in to remind Miles that he wasn’t Derosa and ended up staying in and going one for two with a run scored and two rbi’s. Not bad for a guy from the island of you know where.

Derrek Lee – Lee went one for three today to bring his spring average up to a robust .250. No double play jokes. Not today.

Micah Hoffpauir — he went two for four today with another rbi to make it eight on the young spring. Apparently he is so impressed with his own play that he’s been seen writing his name on all of D-Lee’s underwear.

Mike Fontenot — went one for two with a walk and a strikeout. Was overheard in the fourth inning telling Miles “It’s Ok, Im not Derosa either.”

Bobby Scales –Scales replaced Fontenot in the game and is apparently busy “Keeping up with the Rivas’s” –he went two for three with three rbi’s. Hmm, maybe it’s time to start thinking about some elective surgery.

Koyie Hill — Koyie went one for three with a two rbi double. Only gives the finger now to the cross-eyed.

Sam Fuld — Aww F*&Ck Fuld. Why’d you have to go do something like go two for two and f-up the kool-aid. Fuck.

And just like that the Cubs keep on rolling. Are we seeing the Pinella presence here? Or is the team finally being constructed intelligently with good scouting, coaching, and plate patience. If you’re a fan you have to like what you’re seeing so far, with a pitching staff giving up less walks than k’s and the inverse from Cubs batters at the plate( I don’t know if that statistic is actually true.) Heilman showed today that he really wants that fifth starter spot, but as long as Marshall keeps pitching well along with some of the other guys in camp we might be in for an exciting season.

IF BY SOME CHANCE I happen to have Jinxed the team and they end up breaking off a string of 170+ consecutive losses remember this:

__________________

I’ve got nothin.

Cubs travel to Peoria to take on the Padres and guess who ...

That’s right– Mr. Not Brian Roberts.

First pitch is at 2:05

The Sox did a whole lot of this .

Yea, I’m all like WTF! too, but still…

HA!

Rangers Shocked/Offended! Drop game 10-4:

To the Cubs Friday afternoon in Surprise…downed by the long ball. And who is supplying all of this power you might ask?

Micah Hoffpauir

Mikey Fontenot

Sam Fuld

That’s right, not an …irez , ..oto,..oriano in the bunch. Also not an everyday major league player in the bunch. I know spring training is supposed to be the time to let your farm guys play against a bunch of other teams farm guys and cast-offs hoping to make it to the bench, but considering the Cubs history of developing solid everyday position players a little excitement isn’t really unwarranted here. So in honor of that today we are going to start:

AT THE PLATE

Micah Hoffpauir — he went two for three today, one of those hits being a three-run second inning bomb. That brings his total up to two home runs and seven rbi’s in three limited action games. He is hitting .364 so far and showing that maybe his glove isn’t just an ice cream cone he duct taped to his wrist.

Mike Fontenot –everyones second favorite French Cajun hit a two run homer in the second and then knocked in two more in the six while legging out a triple for a total of four rbi’s. Lou was so impressed with Fontenot and his .286 average that after the game he and Pinella spent some one on one time together( I know, Weird. I didn’t know they were Asian either).

Ryan Theriot –speaking of the favorite son, Theriot started the game at short and went two for four with two singles and a caught stealing. That’s it. There is nothing funny about The Riot.

Sam Fuld – you probably remember Fuld as the guy who made that one catch that one time. Yea, that  guy. He went one for two with a walk and a home-run of his own. Fuld’s shot at making the big club is negligible at best with Hoffpauir hitting as well as he is and the presence of Joey Gathright. Could get a shot later this season if something goes terribly, terribly wrong.

Jake Fox –Fox got into the game today again, going one for one as a replacement for Micah at first. The club seems to be giving him a lot of  playing time, possibly in the hopes that he could be the backup at third considering the alternatives are Miles/Fontentot. Meh Cubs, I agree, Meh.

Jason Dubois –Dubois went one for five as the DH today, once again proving that he can hit–Just not the majority of the time.

Geovany Soto –What’s to be said? He sports a .500 average and  plays stellar defense. Today was his last game before reporting to the Puerto Rican national team’s camp. He says he wants to honor his country, but I think it’s just so he can get close to a certain someone.  Get em geo.

Luis Rivas — One half of the minor League monster that is Scales/Rivas, the former Twin went two for five while starting at third. He’s carrying a .426 average and may be a better answer to the defensively challenged Fox in the ” Hey Aramis, STAY THE F*&K ON THE FIELD” sweepstakes.

Doug Deeds –played the whole game in left and went two for five at the plate. Is apparently great friends with Jason Waddell on the island of “WHO THE F*&CK ARE YOU?”

RF –went a combined O for five. So Taguchi you are So mediocre. Robnett gets a pass( I think you know why.)

All in all the Cubs prospects are doing well. Things are looking good down on the farm, and the team may be able to go into the season with a 25 man roster boasting nine Cub system players(Theriot, Fontenot, Hoffpauir, Hill, Zambrano, Soto, Samardzija, Marshall, Guzman) being a five and four mix with more position players than pitchers. Take that Mark Grace.

But onto the main event…..

I know. It’s terrifying.

Thedodore Roosevelt Lilly took the mound today in the first and proceeded to bend Rangers hitters(and everything else) to his utter will. Lilly pitched two scoreless innings allowing(Lilly doesn’t give up anything…he allows) two hits and striking out only two. Those two were later found dead. Who says Lilly can’t be merciful?

ALSO PITCHED:

J.R. Mathes –two runs on four hits and a walk in two. Non-roster invitee, could be a pen arm. Then again maybe not.

Justin Berg –no runs on no hits with two walks and two K’s. Yep, sounds like a Cub prospect.

Ed Campusano –no runs on no hits and two walks. Seeing action for the second time in as many days, Campusano is a lefty and could be a good replacement for Marshall if he ends up as the Cub’s Five.

Rocky Roquet –yes, yes, he has an awesome name. He also has an 18.00 era and a ticket booked back to West Tenn. He pitched one giving up two runs on three hits and a walk with two K’s.

Marcos Mateo –no hits and no runs with a strikeout in one. First action from Mateo, is definitely headed back to High A or AA for more seasoning.

Jeff Stevens –worked the ninth giving up no hits and no runs with two k’s. Cub most likely to be injured in a Nancy Kerrigan style hit. Cub Fan’s loved them some Derosa( I did too, watch your back Stevens).

Stevens has so far turned in a good performance and could legitimately contribute to the big club this year, hopefully nullifying some of the “We Got Nothin,” talk. If the young Cub players keep producing throughout spring training it could give fans hope that the much maligned farm system may be back on track before we even get to see what super scout Tim Wilkens first crop can do.  Today’s was the last game for World baseball classic members Lilly and Soto, who go to play for their respective countries and give Cub fans a serious case of anxiety.

Tomorrows game is against the White Sox( if I could link you to a boo, just a disembodied recording of a boo, I so would right here) at Ho Ho Kam. You would think the game is televised somewhere, but if it is I haven’t been able to locate the information.  First Pitch is at 2:05.

This is what the Rangers did.

You’ve just been Chuck’d.

Once again haunting Ho Ho Kam park in preparation for the 2009 season. Full squad workouts began at their Mesa, Arizona facility  on the 20th with only one notable name missing, that being their pirouetting, non-righty hitting, early season mania-inducing only to be disappointed/confused at WHAT EXACTLY IS HE SWINGING AT?! right center fielder Kosuke Fukudome.

But more on him later.

GM Jim Hendry spent the majority of the early off-season dodging rumors(Peavy…Peavy…Peavy) and courting the switch hitting, off-field headline producing Milton Bradley before kicking it into high gear on last day of 2008 by trading Mark Derosa to the Cleveland Indians for three pitching prospects. Trading fan favorite Derosa proved unpopular and left many fans feeling validated in their belief that Hendry is in fact a donut hoarding idiot(why it’s always donuts I don’t understand). He followed that move up by jettisoning:

An idiot(Cedeno to Seattle along with Garret Olsen for former Met disappointment Aaron Heilman)

A malcontent(Jason Marquis and his drain of a salary to Colorado for the Lovely Luis Viscaino, his 5+ era, propensity for drunk driving, and…being a malcontent)

The next Lou Brock?(more likely Corey Patterson Felix Pie and his inabiltiy to hit major league pitching to Baltimore for Heilman bait Garret Olsen and RHP Henry Williamson)

And another idiot(Rich Hill also to Baltimore for a player to be named later determined by his effectiveness…which means that player will most likely be hitting off of a tee and have to be in the house by dark.)

So what have we learned about Hendry this offseason?

*That apparently he considers Baltimore to be his own personal waste dump.

*That he coveted Bradley enough to give him a 3yr/30 million dollar contract(although the third year is dependent upon games played.)

*That Gabor (Paul) Bako must have seen him do something terrible because he is back in camp at the bargain? price of 725K.

*That if you can jump over cars then you can play for the Cubs. No matter how mediocre you truly are.Gathright Jumping Car.

He is projected to cover the quota of bench players being tagged out at second following a walk now that Cedeno is gone.

*He also signed some guys to Minor League deals like So taguchi, Mike Stanton..blah, blah

Im not going to touch on the Kerry Wood subject in this post. But yea, he’s gone too. To Cleveland.

In an effort to shorten what is already proving to be a tedious and long post here is what you have to look forward to in upcoming entries:

*Zambrano needs Lasik–Dempster jealous of His “Sweet Ass Looking” eyepatch.

*Johnson doesn’t think he’s better than Fukudome. His beard reportedly does.

*Short white guy or short white guy, who’s on second?

*The Bullpen/Bench , which is more boring?

*I love Geo Soto(Thats it, no lame joke.)

Spring training play begins Wednesday February 25th at Ho Ho Kam with Jeff ” The Shark” Samardzija starting against the Dodgers.(yea…F those guys), followed on Thursday and Friday by starts from Sean Marshall and Ted F’in Lilly.

Notes:

WBC- Lilly(USA), Fukudome(JAPAN), and Soto(PUERTO RICO) are the only Cubs still committed to play for their country in this years classic.

TV- For a complete listing of Spring training Games on television visit either www.cubs.com or you can link to this post from their message board(kindly provided by one of their posters)– http://www.forums.mlb.com/n/pfx/forum.aspx?tsn=1&nav=messages&webtag=ml-cubs&tid=351492

Fuku- I told you I would get back to him. In exhibition play he has hit a two run triple as well as a grand slam against Nippen league team opponents. In how many at bats I don’t know, but I’m hoping it is two.

Interviews/Batting practice- Here is a link to Spring Training Interviews with Marshall, Fuld, and Cotts provided by mouthpiece sports: http://www.mouthpiecesports.com/blog/tag/Chicago-Cubs/

And here are links to BP from spring training:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RW3bRyPq0q4&feature=channel_page

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fn_b5BcH_ww&feature=channel_page

Thats it for my first post of 2009. I’ll be updating regularly with news, rumors, transactions, winning series recaps, losing series excuses and in general lousy humor and shoddy reporting. As I learn how to use this more I am hoping to be able to make it easier to follow links.

Sweetlou

The Cubs also reassigned Les Walrond, Micah Hoffpauir, and Casey McGehee to minor league camp.