Go ahead and scream racism you f*&cking Pinheads.

Okay, It’s not really much of a manifesto. We(yea, we’re adopting the royal “WE”, cuts down on the feeling of personal culpability WHEN something stupid is inevitably said) just re-read our last post and realized we have an affinity for repeating ourselves.

But Oh well:

WORLD  BASEBALL  CLASSIC :

If you aren’t watchin this then FUCK YOU.

So far we have seen:

The Dominican Republic and Carlos Marmol get kickf*&cked right out of the tournament by The Dutch.

That’s right, a lineup consisting of this:

Arredondo, Jose 66
Cueto, Johnny 46
Jimenez, Ubaldo 38
Manon, Julio 20
Marmol, Carlos 49
Marte, Damaso 43
Martinez, Pedro 45
Pena, Tony 58
Perez, Odalis 57
Perez, Rafael 53
Tavarez, Julian 51
Viola, Pedro 44
Volquez, Edinson

CATCHERS
Brito, Juan 25
Castillo, Alberto 33
Olivo, Miguel 21

INFIELDERS
Aybar, Willy 16
Cano, Robinson 24
Ortiz, David 34
Ramirez, Hanley 2
Reyes, Jose 7
Tatis, Fernando 14
Tejada, Miguel 10

OUTFIELDERS
Alou, Moises 18
Bautista, Jose 23
Cruz, Nelson 15
Guillen, Jose 11
Taveras, Willy

were sent packing by this.

Check the birth-dates on the major league affiliated players.

At one point during the Puerto Rico/Netherlands game a 19 year old Red’s prospect, who had never pitched above the high school level, struck out Ivan Rodriguez and induced Carlos Beltran into a weak ground out to first, working his way out of a bases loaded jam and preserving the lead.

His catcher was a twenty-one year old Double AA ball player.

YU DARVISH made eighteen game winner for Boston, Daisuke Matsuzaka, look unpolished, nervous, and overall extraneous as he showed that tossing a shitload of junk amidst some gems isn’t dominance. Everything hurts in a hurricane Daisuke. Even alliteration.

Not that that really illustrated the point( see–make a muddled metaphor, go ahead and cling to the cliche, alliteration-an inside look at the mind of a tipsy hack)

Chipper Jones and his N.L. batting title pull an oblique muscle(now reported to be healthy enough to play in RD. 2) Don’t do these things major league stars. If anything is going to kill this tournament it’s going to be injuries/poor seasons from Big Money players.

Canada eliminated.

Joey Votto looked spectacular though. Cinci fans have a reason to go to their beautiful park.

Puerto Rico is the anti-island of misfit toys for catchers. Here is their depth chart:

Ivan Rodriguez

Yadier Molina

Geovany Soto

AND they have been using a DH in their pool, so guess who has been filling in? Numbers one and three(Eat a D**ck number two…..guess what team he plays for?)

We’re not a fan.

Puerto Rico is 3-0 and 6-0 in overall WBC first round play.

CHINA A baseball program built from the ground up by American Ex-pat’s(Jim Lefebvre, Terry Collins) China may be gone from the tourney after a loss to Korea, but it boasts very few MLB players, the only notable I can name from watching is Ray Chang, their shortstop who played well despite their losses, and is an American born player from Kansas City. The growing Chinese baseball program is just one among the many reasons that this tournament IS IMPORTANT, especially considering the lack of Olympic support for the sport.

SOMEONE needs to throw their support behind this tournament. Someone with a national audience and the credentials/passion/eloquence to make people understand that for  FIVE FUCKING OUTS of an “EXHIBITION” game 19 year old Juan Carlos Sulbaran(he doesn’t have a  pro stats link, not fucking one) pitched his brains out against the stacked P.R. team. It was so goddamn electrifying. Watch the replay you nay-saying pissants.

Henry Blanco finally Cubs related, hit an 0-1 fastball into the seats to give Venezuela their eventual 5-3 lead over the USA today. Who’d Hank White own? Ted Fuckin Lilly.

Lilly went four, giving up that one run. Ted being Ted.

I know, this blog was weak with factual information, but we promise daily blogging and pertinent, Cub related information from here on out.(Okay, maybe once S.T. is over)

Today was the first Cub day off since the beginning of spring training. Someone goes tomorrow against someone. Oh, shit, I just remembered, it’s the CUBS VS. THE JAPANESE NATIONAL TEAM.

AWKWARD?

You kind of have to look past the “awesome” copyright anti-infringement measure…

But I understand. It’s cool ….

And for the rest of you villagers–put down those torches and pitchforks.

I know we lost four to two to that blabber-mouth D*&ck and his pet.

It’s Okay

It’s only Spring Training. 

But today did have a bit of that, I don’t know–”Catch the F*&cking ball!” after-taste.

Did it not?

I mean, Dempster may not have walked  7/9ths of the roster( only one), but it does give you that same eerie feeling creeping up the back of your spine, No?

I realize I’m mixing games one and two of last October’s post-season meltdown together for my own narrow purpose but…

Come on!

HITTING

Ryan Theriot –You may have gone two for three today, but all you really did was play into your critics hands. The rest of your line read a bunch of sh*&tty zero’s, meaning your two hollow singles and .600 average didn’t make up for the two(fielding, throwing) errors and being the absolute reason the Cubs lost today.

But it’s cool…

I am not an Anti-Theriotite, just disappointed that today’s L in the loss column speaks more loudly than the actual facts( That Cubs hitting and pitching, all major factors in the past, put. them. in. place. for the win).

On the bright side — Aaron Miles grounded into two double plays today. So that means we can finally all go back to liking this guy.

Whew…

Mike Fontenot — Some people may think–”Oh, that is so cute! He thinks he’s a third baseman honey.”

But not me.

Mike went two for three today, both doubles, and scored one of the Cubs two runs. He is hitting .417(five for twelve, with four of those being extra base hits) this spring.

Reed Johnson –You Son of a Bitch! You went one for three and PUT. THAT. SHIT. DOWN. in center..until Fuld came in to pinch run ?

Jake Fox — I am so sorry Jake( error 1, fielding), but you did get a hit in three at bats. You even scored a run!

AND……..THAT’S IT?

Cub bat’s were pretty quiet against Peavy, with whipping boy Theriot registering the only hit in his three innings. It’s a disappointing outcome to be sure, but not a reason for this because…

PITCHING

Although the box score may not read it, Dempster actually pitched well. He may have faced a total of seven batters in the first inning, but his overall line was two hits with one walk and a K. Sooo–ledgies may be dropping like flies right now, but at least so did Padres hitters when facing…

ALSO PITCHED:

Chad Fox — The man with the oldest arm on the planet pitched a scoreless inning today, giving up a hit with no walks and a K.

Mike Stanton — Just plain old f*&cking old. Goddamn Pinella?  Stanton pitched a perfect inning– and then the sun came up. Ha!

Justin Berg — gave up the only earned run in the game. Some have called this move the “Gutenburg.”

Rocky Roquet– a hit a walk and no runs. Has never heard of “The Gutenburg.”

Kevin Hart — no hit and no walks with a K in one. Hart has bounced back and forth between the Major and Minor leagues the past year or so. Hart could be in the pen, but then again could not. Meh.

Marcos Mateo — His second(or third?) spring training appearance, he closed out the ninth with a perfect inning and a K. Who the F*&ck knows anymore?

With so many pitchers showing up in such a short time you can’t really get a good bead on who is doing what for now and what for the long run yet.

CORRECTIONS:

WBC– The Cubs are actually sending seven players to the classic this year: Lilly(USA), Fukudome(Japan). Marmol(Dominican Republic), Alex Maestri( Italy..and he’s actually Italian!), Soto(Puerto Rico)  Koskie(Canada), and Vince Perkins( Also Canada).

The WBC begins Thursday March Fifth in Tokyo, Japan with a matchup between Japan and China. Game time is 4:30 am eastern standard on ESPN2 and ESPN deportes. Cub Fans will finally get their first good look at Kosuke this spring, so tune in.  The MLB NETWORK will be carrying sixteen games over the course of the classic including, I would imagine, the finals to be played at Dodger Stadium.

The Cubs host the D-ba(gs)cks( are you kidding…are you really going to make it that easy Arizona?) at Ho Ho Kam tomorrow. On the mound in the first is….

CARLOS ZAMBRANO!

Making his first start this spring.

First pitch is at 2:05 Central Standard Time.

Rangers Shocked/Offended! Drop game 10-4:

To the Cubs Friday afternoon in Surprise…downed by the long ball. And who is supplying all of this power you might ask?

Micah Hoffpauir

Mikey Fontenot

Sam Fuld

That’s right, not an …irez , ..oto,..oriano in the bunch. Also not an everyday major league player in the bunch. I know spring training is supposed to be the time to let your farm guys play against a bunch of other teams farm guys and cast-offs hoping to make it to the bench, but considering the Cubs history of developing solid everyday position players a little excitement isn’t really unwarranted here. So in honor of that today we are going to start:

AT THE PLATE

Micah Hoffpauir — he went two for three today, one of those hits being a three-run second inning bomb. That brings his total up to two home runs and seven rbi’s in three limited action games. He is hitting .364 so far and showing that maybe his glove isn’t just an ice cream cone he duct taped to his wrist.

Mike Fontenot –everyones second favorite French Cajun hit a two run homer in the second and then knocked in two more in the six while legging out a triple for a total of four rbi’s. Lou was so impressed with Fontenot and his .286 average that after the game he and Pinella spent some one on one time together( I know, Weird. I didn’t know they were Asian either).

Ryan Theriot –speaking of the favorite son, Theriot started the game at short and went two for four with two singles and a caught stealing. That’s it. There is nothing funny about The Riot.

Sam Fuld – you probably remember Fuld as the guy who made that one catch that one time. Yea, that  guy. He went one for two with a walk and a home-run of his own. Fuld’s shot at making the big club is negligible at best with Hoffpauir hitting as well as he is and the presence of Joey Gathright. Could get a shot later this season if something goes terribly, terribly wrong.

Jake Fox –Fox got into the game today again, going one for one as a replacement for Micah at first. The club seems to be giving him a lot of  playing time, possibly in the hopes that he could be the backup at third considering the alternatives are Miles/Fontentot. Meh Cubs, I agree, Meh.

Jason Dubois –Dubois went one for five as the DH today, once again proving that he can hit–Just not the majority of the time.

Geovany Soto –What’s to be said? He sports a .500 average and  plays stellar defense. Today was his last game before reporting to the Puerto Rican national team’s camp. He says he wants to honor his country, but I think it’s just so he can get close to a certain someone.  Get em geo.

Luis Rivas — One half of the minor League monster that is Scales/Rivas, the former Twin went two for five while starting at third. He’s carrying a .426 average and may be a better answer to the defensively challenged Fox in the ” Hey Aramis, STAY THE F*&K ON THE FIELD” sweepstakes.

Doug Deeds –played the whole game in left and went two for five at the plate. Is apparently great friends with Jason Waddell on the island of “WHO THE F*&CK ARE YOU?”

RF –went a combined O for five. So Taguchi you are So mediocre. Robnett gets a pass( I think you know why.)

All in all the Cubs prospects are doing well. Things are looking good down on the farm, and the team may be able to go into the season with a 25 man roster boasting nine Cub system players(Theriot, Fontenot, Hoffpauir, Hill, Zambrano, Soto, Samardzija, Marshall, Guzman) being a five and four mix with more position players than pitchers. Take that Mark Grace.

But onto the main event…..

I know. It’s terrifying.

Thedodore Roosevelt Lilly took the mound today in the first and proceeded to bend Rangers hitters(and everything else) to his utter will. Lilly pitched two scoreless innings allowing(Lilly doesn’t give up anything…he allows) two hits and striking out only two. Those two were later found dead. Who says Lilly can’t be merciful?

ALSO PITCHED:

J.R. Mathes –two runs on four hits and a walk in two. Non-roster invitee, could be a pen arm. Then again maybe not.

Justin Berg –no runs on no hits with two walks and two K’s. Yep, sounds like a Cub prospect.

Ed Campusano –no runs on no hits and two walks. Seeing action for the second time in as many days, Campusano is a lefty and could be a good replacement for Marshall if he ends up as the Cub’s Five.

Rocky Roquet –yes, yes, he has an awesome name. He also has an 18.00 era and a ticket booked back to West Tenn. He pitched one giving up two runs on three hits and a walk with two K’s.

Marcos Mateo –no hits and no runs with a strikeout in one. First action from Mateo, is definitely headed back to High A or AA for more seasoning.

Jeff Stevens –worked the ninth giving up no hits and no runs with two k’s. Cub most likely to be injured in a Nancy Kerrigan style hit. Cub Fan’s loved them some Derosa( I did too, watch your back Stevens).

Stevens has so far turned in a good performance and could legitimately contribute to the big club this year, hopefully nullifying some of the “We Got Nothin,” talk. If the young Cub players keep producing throughout spring training it could give fans hope that the much maligned farm system may be back on track before we even get to see what super scout Tim Wilkens first crop can do.  Today’s was the last game for World baseball classic members Lilly and Soto, who go to play for their respective countries and give Cub fans a serious case of anxiety.

Tomorrows game is against the White Sox( if I could link you to a boo, just a disembodied recording of a boo, I so would right here) at Ho Ho Kam. You would think the game is televised somewhere, but if it is I haven’t been able to locate the information.  First Pitch is at 2:05.

This is what the Rangers did.

You’ve just been Chuck’d.

I know that traditionally in the baseball world when a players middle name is replaced with the aforementioned F word(fucking), that it’s used to display a fans displeasure.

example:

Aaron “Fucking” Boone

But I’m taking it back.

To honor the badassery that is Ted “F’in” Lilly.

You know all those Chuck Norris jokes where everything ends in Chuck Norris kicking somethings ass?

Well they should all end with the words “…and Ted Lilly”

Try it, it works. Sometimes…

Lilly makes his spring debut against the Rangers later today before hopping a flight to meet up with the other members of team USA . Lilly is the only member of the Cubs to represent our country in the  2009 classic, but is joined on the roster by former cub(apparently the best to ever don the uniform if you believe Internet message boards) Mark Derosa. I wouldn’t expect anything too eventful from him, probably two innings and out. So that’s six strikeouts and he hits the showers.

Things to watch for :

PITCHING

So far we’ve yet to see:

Jose Ascanio

Neal Cotts

Kevin Gregg

Marcos Mateo

Luis Viscaino

Randy Wells

Ed Campusano

J.R. Mathes

Matt Smith

Bill White

Andrew Cashner

Rocky Roquet

I expect to be able to cross a few names off this list. Notables to watch are Jose Ascanio, who came over from the Braves before last season In the  Ohman trade.

Ha. Ohman.

Andrew Cashner, the Cubs first round draft pick last year. A former closer in college, from what it look like the Cubs are either going to try him as a starter or are giving him lots of work to master his pitches in the minor leagues.  Rule-Fiver Ed Campusano could be intriguing after returning to the Cubs from Milwaukee as well as Cubs farm-hand Rocky Roquet. Campusano is the only lefty of the three I’ve mentioned so his probability of making the club is exponentially higher than the other two, who both need more time in the minors to develop. Today’s game could also give us the debut of former Marlins closer Kevin Gregg. Gregg was acquired in the off season for minor league pitcher Jose Ceda.

I’m going to address this now. I know Hendry was fleeced in the Juan Pierre trade, but just because you believe Ceda is going to turn into this doesn’t mean he isn’t going to turn into this.

Poor Rich.

Gregg is coming off a down season, yet was still able to compile sixty-one saves in his two years as Marlins finisher. We might see Cotts too.

Hooray!?

Hitting

Behind the plate so far we’ve seen:

2008 rookie of the year Geovany Soto

Paul Bako

That’s the joke.

But there are still at least three more catchers in camp this spring. Koyie Hill, the man who cut his own fingers off– packed them in ice–and then drove himself to the hospital, is actively battling it out with Bako for the right to backup Geovany. Koyie , a switch hitter known more for his defense than his plate prowess,  can’t be sure of how legitimate his shot is considering the size of contract the Cubs gave to Bako. The other two catchers in camp are minor league prospects who might actually develop into major league talent, and as fellow Cub fans know, is a rarity for position players with the Cubs. Problem here is that Geovany has emerged as a solid player and barring a drastic turn for the worse, Welington Castillo and Steve Clevenger could be little more than trading chips at this point. Clevenger so far has seemed handier with the bat, but both are making decent strides offensively as well as being solid defenders.

Also back in camp is perpetual Iowa Cub Jason Dubois.

He doesn’t get a link.

First Pitch is at 2:05 central time.

If anyone is interested, the Cubs Give away free pocket schedules. Just call 773-404-CUBS and follow the prompts. It took a few weeks but in my envelope I received two pocket schedules as well as a free Cubs logo decal sticker. Not a huge deal, but free.

I know, I’m like a child.

Aramis Ramirez and Jim Edmonds also hit solo home runs in the game. The offense took a while to get going, but when they did it was a great scene!

Kerry Wood ended up with the win and worked his way out of a huge jam in the top of the 12th inning. Wood is now 5-4 on the year. Cubs starting pitcher Rich Harden only pitched five innings but only allowed one hit. The reason he only lasted five innings was because he walked six batters and struck out seven and his pitch count was very high.

Jeff Samardzija struggled out of of the pen once again as he gave up two run. Neal Cotts also allowed one run in relief.

The team found a way to win and that is exactly what they needed to do. I’m pretty sure we will see the Cubs clinch the division this weekend against the St. Louis Cardinals!

Cubs Blog

Lilly gave up a sharp line drive to left center in the seventh inning to Mark Loretta before finishing out the inning and getting a standing ovation. Lilly improved to 15-9 with the win as he pitched awesome. I was sitting here thinking “Wouldn’t it be awesome to see two no hitters in back to back days?”, however it wasn’t meant to be but I’ll take that performance any day of the week.

Derrek Lee and Geovany Soto both hit two-run home runs in the game to set the pace for the Cubs. Both of the home runs came in the sixth inning when the Cubs score four runs. Jim Edmonds also went deep in the fourth inning for a solo shot. Aramis Ramirez got the Cubs scoring started with a rbi sac fly in the first inning.

It was a great game all around for the Cubs as they are currently up eight games in the division and will start a series with the Milwaukee Brewers on Tuesday. The Cubs have a shot at clinching the division at home, so hopefully we will see another great series out of the Cubs!

Ted Lilly didn’t have his best stuff as he was charged with four runs but it was good enough to get the win and improve to 12-6 on the year. Bob Howy had some trouble as he allowed a three run home run that got the Braves back within four runs. Carlos Marmol and Kerry Wood then finished up the Braves in the final two innings.

Aramis Ramirez hit a three run home run to lead the Cubbies at the plate with three rbi. Alfonso Soriano added a two run shot of his own as well. Geovany Soto had another great game at the plate as he had three walks and two rbi. Mark DeRosa, Reed Johnson, Daryle Ward, and Ryan Theriot all had one rbi each as well.

The Cubbies will try to make it nine in a row on the road Friday night as they take on the Florida Marlins. Big Z will be taking the mound for the Cubs.

Cubs Baseball Blog

Right now I’ll just give you a short recap of game one of the double header against the Braves.  The Cubs bats were swinging and knocking in runs as they crushed the Braves 10-2.  Jason Marquis tossed 5 1/3 innings to pick up the win.  Marquis didn’t pitch too badly as he gave up six hits and two runs, but his pitch count really got up there and that is why he only lasted a little over five innings.  Marquis had to work out of jams quite a few times and that is why the pitchcount was so high.

Neal Cotts, Jeff Samardzija, and Bob Howry all seen action out of the bullpen.  All three pitched great and allowed the team to save Kerry Wood and Carlos Marmol for the second game which will kick off at 6 p.m. central time.

Geovany Soto led the offense by going 3-4 with four rbi.  Soto had a two run double in the second inning and then added a two run home run in the ninth inning.  I would expect to see Soto sit out the second game and Henry Blanco to get the start.  Jim Edmonds also had a good game at the plate as he had three rbi in the game.  Aramis Ramirez, Mark DeRosa, and Ryan Theriot all added one rbi each as well.

Let’s go get game two and hopefully see a Brewers loss later tonight. GO CUBS!

Cubs Baseball

Giants ace, Tim Lincecum, kept Cub’s bats at bay as the Giants prevented the sweep with a 4-2 victory over the Cubs on Sunday afternoon.  Lincecum showed again why he is on the NL All-Star team and a CY Young candidate.  Lincecum threw 8 innings giving up 1 run on 6 hits.  He added to his league leading total of strikeouts by whiffing 9 Cub’s batters. 

The Giants started their scoring in the 3^rd inning when Lincecum helped his own cause by tripling in Omar Vizquel for the game’s first run.  A two out single from Ray Durham would give the Giants 2 more runs in the inning and a 3-0 lead.

The Cubs would plate a run in the 4^th inning on a double from the hot-hitting Cub’s centerfielder Jim Edmonds.  He has proven to be a very valuable and low-risk midseason pickup for Jim Hendry.  The Cubs needed another left-handed batter in their lineup and Edmonds has proved very serviceable.   

The Giants would take a 4-1 lead to the 9^th inning after an RBI triple from Fred Lewis.   The Giants then went to closer Brian Wilson for a chance at a league leading 25^th save.  Edmonds would walk and score leaving a pinch hit chance for Geovany Soto with one out and two on.  Representing the tying run, Soto struck out on a called third strike.  Cub’s shortstop Ryan Theriot, who had extended his hitting streak to ten games earlier, ground out to in the game.   Ryan Dempster was credited with his first loss at home this year giving up four earned runs, seven hits, and striking out six.  Dempster now falls to 10-4 on the season.

Special Notes:  Cub’s reliever, Carlos Marmol, will replace Cub’s closer Kerry Wood in the All-Star game due to a minor blister that Kerry wants to give a chance to heal. 

 Carlos Zambrano pitched 8 brilliant innings in route to his 10^th victory of 2008 on a beautiful night in Wrigley.  Zambrano located his pitches very well having both the slider and sinker working nicely.  Coming off the DL only last week, Zambrano gave up a homerun to Adam Dunn, with one out in the 2nd inning, and then sat down the next 20 Reds batters he faced.  

Offensively the Cubs got it going early.  After going down 1-0 on  Adam Dunn’s homerun the Cubs answered as rookie All-Star Geovany Soto led off the second with a double, and then scored from second on an error by Cincinnati Red’s shortstop Jeff Keppinger.  Soto’s hustle was reminiscent of his inside the park homerun in Houston earlier this year.

After Cubs shortstop Ryan Theriot made a brilliant play to end the top half of the 6^th inning, Aramis Ramirez took the very first pitch of the bottom half and sent it to souvenir city to give the Cubs their first lead of the game.  Red’s pitcher Johnny Cueto would then go on to strike out the next two batters and escape any further damange.  The Cubs offense struck again the very next inning.  After Cub’s left fielder Reed Johnson led off with a single, Zambrano attempted to bunt him over to second.  Zambrano was called out at first even though he beat the throw by a country mile.  This brought Lou out of the dugout and sparked the Cub’s offense.  With two outs, Kosuke Fukudome doubled in Reed Johnson to give the cubs a 3-1 lead.  Derek Lee and Aramis Ramirez then both followed with RBI hits off of Red’s reliever David Weathers and the Cubs went in to the 8^th inning with a 5-1 lead. 

Carlos Marmol came in to pitch for the Cubs in the top of the 9^th and got into some early trouble.  After appearing to tweak his foot, while making the second out of the inning, Carlos then gave up a hit and walked the next two batters to load the bases.  Lou then made the call for All-Star closer Kerry Wood to come in for a chance at his 23^rd save.  Wood did not disappoint an ecstatic Wrigley crowd by getting Red’s second baseman Brandon Phillips to pop out to Derek Lee for the last out of the game.

Carlos Zambrano gets the win as he pitches 8 strong innings giving up only one hit and one run while striking out 5.  He moves to 10-3 on the season and looks to pitch next in the All-Star game at Yankee Stadium.  Cueto is credited with the loss as he moves to 7-9 on the season.

Ted Lilly will take the mound tomorrow in hopes of becoming the third Cub pitcher to win his 10th game of the season as he faces Cinicinnati right-hander Bronson Arroyo.  The Cubs will be looking to sweep the Reds and win their 4^th straight. 

Written By:  Murray Shaw