Cross-Town Classic…Sort Of

Cub prosperity has hit even the hardest working Sox Fans

“What’s it been like, a hundred years?”

“Say hi to Bartman for me”

“Joe Crede is waaayyy better than Ramirez.”

“..yea, if you mean by greatest fans a bunch of beer drinking fratboy yuppies who don’t even know the score to the game”

“CUBs S*&CK”

These are just a few of the inane, biased, and trite things you’ll hear come out of a Sox fans mouth when one even begins to screw up their lips and begin to breathe the dreaded C word.

Oh, forgot this one.

“Yea, if  by that you mean the “attendance world series.”

Which is a personal favorite of mine. Now I’m not saying all Sox fans are dumb and that all Cub fans actually watch the game–I’ve actually heard some pretty funny things come out of Sox fans mouths in regards to the Cubs.

But that isn’t what I’m about here(and I’m just way too tired to reach my usual level of mediocrity)

(more…)

Rangers Shocked/Offended! Drop game 10-4:

To the Cubs Friday afternoon in Surprise… (more…)

A Tribute To “Ted F’in Lilly”

I know that traditionally in the baseball world when a players middle name is replaced with the aforementioned F word(fucking), that it’s used to display a fans displeasure.

example:

Aaron “Fucking” Boone

But I’m taking it back.

To honor the badassery that is Ted “F’in” Lilly.

You know all those Chuck Norris jokes where everything ends in Chuck Norris kicking somethings ass?

Well they should all end with the words “…and Ted Lilly”

Try it, it works. Sometimes… (more…)

Seriously?

What is he made of–anti-diamond?(which is the opposite of diamond, and by my logic that should mean extremely brittle)

Ok, that’s a stretch–but he was pulled(by himself) from today’s game after feeling tightness in his quad during his first at bat.

A game that we won I might add.

Beating the Brewers 7-4 at Ho Ho Kam (more…)

Some common definitions of pre-gaming:

1. The time alloted before the start of an event where players and or coaches review strategy and overall  organizational coherence.

2. The time alloted before the start of an event dedicated to fans gathering and drinking heavily therefore avoiding outrageous stadium alcohol prices.

3. Two University of Wyoming coeds dancing and sipping from a bottle of crown while you wait four hours to go to a bar that oddly enough also hosted shots of crown and music for dancing(this is the one I’m stuck with since it was the first time I’d ever heard it used this way. Needless to say “pre-gaming” isn’t in my lexicon.)

…In an effort to keep this one short(The game starts in like twenty minutes) I am going to give you some basic things to look for: (more…)

…Or maybe not.

I was trying to post video directly to the page, thereby avoiding linking you to an outside source–BUT, as it turns out, I have no clue how to do that.

So here you go.

Onto Cub related news.

CUBS WIN!…SOME MORE…

The team rolled into spring training the way they rolled out of last season–winning( There was no October in 2008. Weird, I know.)

And the team that they beat?

Yep. (more…)

What? It’s science…

And in other out of shape, sweaty guy news, former Cubs closer Joe Borowski has decided to retire.

Borowski, a thirteen year veteran, pitched in both leagues as a reliever for a total of eight different teams.

But who cares about those guys.

Sweaty Joe will always be remembered by Cub fans as that one guy who was even scarier to watch close games than this guy.

And for his three years on the northside, most notably the 2003 debacle/division championship season.

So goodbye to you Joe, your mediocre fastball,  your “You’re a professional baseball player?–F%$K you” physique, and your “Really– Joe Borowski?” 2007 AL saves leading season.

And goodbye to this post that has been built upon being as lackluster and factually ambiguous as this guy.

I know what some of you may be thinking.

Or quite possibly none of you.

But why did I? Oh HOW. COULD. I. have not mentioned the departure of the one and only, slider low and away, slider low and away, slider low and away,

Slider low and away

Slider low and away tossing Michael Wuertz. It’s simple.

I forgot. (more…)

The Cubs are back!

Once again haunting Ho Ho Kam park in preparation for the 2009 season. Full squad workouts began at their Mesa, Arizona facility  on the 20th with only one notable name missing, that being their pirouetting, non-righty hitting, early season mania-inducing only to be disappointed/confused at WHAT EXACTLY IS HE SWINGING AT?! right center fielder Kosuke Fukudome.

But more on him later. (more…)

Mesa will soon become a battle ground. To the victor goes the final spot on the Cubs starting staff. The losers may get a spot in the pen, or may not make the major league club at all. From veteran hurlers to rookie phenoms, from crafty lefties to hard throwing righties, I cannot remember the last time the Chicago Cubs had so much talent battling for the last spot in the rotation. Just three years ago Glendon Rusch left spring training as the number 3 man on the Cubs staff. Dark times…

I cannot say I was heartbroken to see Jason Marquis traded to the Colorado Rockies earlier this year. Jason was brought in after the disastrous 2006 season in which no pitcher except for Carlos Zambrano started more than 25 games. Marquis was brought in to bring stability to the Cubs rotation, and to eat innings. In all honesty Marquis did what he was brought in to do. He also blew countless leads, and gave many Cubs fans heart attacks any time he was on the mound. Although the Cubs made the playoffs in the last two years, Jason did not start in any of the six games. Jason just wasn’t part of the long term Cub plan. Now the fifth spot in the rotation is open.

In the days before Spring Training officially kicks off I will write blogs about all of the guys competing for the final spot in the rotation. Starting with Chad Gaudin, Sean Marshall, Jeff Samardzija, and ending with Aaron Heilman, I will give you my analysis on each pitcher.